Please Disperse

i’ll be out of town for the rest of this year.
this is exactly where i’ll be

please come out to visit. i mean that!

I remember studying this in school.

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On [...]

1. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?
[...]

This fat kid, who looks like the annoying kid from Two and a Half Men, wrote about the experience of trading his iPod for a mysterious antique: The Walkman
Some of his best comments:

When I wore it walking down the street or going into shops, I got strange looks, a mixture of surprise and curiosity, that [...]

Found this while surfing today.
I never owned a Members Only jacket. At least, if I did, I’ll never own up to it.
But you can.
http://www.membersonlystyle.com/shop/shop.php/mens-core/c_23.html
Ugly jackets when they were in fashion. Now they just make you look like a child molester.

Classic Superheroes / Mr T / Rocky mashup

stolen from a post on mc chris’s facebook page.

and she probably caught them from Jimmy Kimmel.
I used to think she was sexy because she’s a funny woman. And comediennes really do something for me. I still have a thing for Nicole Sullivan (MadTV, now Family Guy.)
But now, not only is she hairy, but… well, who the hell am I to [...]

The ConMan provides regular tales of bowel movements and other related and unsavory events. As the geek who always wore a NASA hat in elementary school, I thought I’d add my twist on Connie’s favorite subject: scat.
While trawling the blogosphere this morning I discovered a relatively interesting series of posts by Astronaut Leroy Chiao [...]

Filed under the “I Wish I Had More Time” category, I would love to create a dumpster hot tub.
Can you imagine walking outside your apartment to see your neighbor swimming in one of these? Awesome.
Make Magazine

RIP Dom DeLuise. I can’t believe that guy was married. But I really loved watching him and Reynolds crack up in the Cannonball Run outtakes.

enjoy and Rock out with your guac out!

Happy Star Wars Day!

Synecdoche, New York
This film came incredibly well received (Golden Palm nomination at Cannes, Independent Spirit Award, LAFCA, Austin Film Critics Award ) with a phenomenal cast (Philip Seymour Hoffman, Samantha Morton, Catherine Keener, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Hope Davis, Michelle Williams, Dianne Wiest, Emily Watson) and gave me a headache. I’m sure this was [...]

Apologies, I’m sure most of you have seen it.

http://www.jeepforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=697033

It snowed yesterday. I shoveled the driveway around 1030am. As I was shoveling, the snow turned to icy rain then freezing rain.
This morning was recycle morning. The trash service picks up cans, plastic and glass.
Last night the plow hit my two big buckets of recycling.
The collision caused many bottles to break.
They [...]

A nice venue. Small. Dark. Reminiscent of an english pub.
But the whole whisper only and frequent shushing gets tired pretty quickly.
Its a bit pretentious considering its a mediocre assortment of belgian brews- good for the northeast but embarassing in belgium.
I really didn’t like being shushed so ofen.
But three nights a week [...]

Hello 2009
After a relaxing break around the holidays, its right back into it in 09.
So, oback has hit the white haus (thank god!) and today bloggy and his awesome, bullet proof hair have been given das legislative boot.
I’m chilling in new york’s burp factory. Nutpharm wanted to see it, and letme tell you [...]

oj finally went to jail.
oback barama won the election (as opposed to the last guy who didn’t win).
jamie j from whs killed his self.
and clemens didn’t get what he deserves.
anyway, see you clowns in 2009. 2008 was the year i felt old. 2009 is the year i stop caring that i am [...]

DAMN!
(see The ConMan’s post for some context)

watch your back, Juice. and even if you do, i’m sure someone else will too.

Incredible Motorcycle save – Watch more Sports Videos

The patron saint of stupid gun owners.
“I called him and made a few jokes about the situation and his laugh is what I wanted to hear,” Brandon Jacobs said, according to Newsday. “If he didn’t laugh I knew he was going to be down, which he shouldn’t be down. It’s a mistake that happened, something [...]

It’s good to see that Val Kilmer really does have a sense of humor. I figured he would after making Real Genius and Top Secret! but I knew he had a sense of humor after he appeared as the voice of KITT!
I hadn’t even heard of this SNL episode until recently.
Enjoy (or don’t)
http://video.aol.com/video-detail/snl-top-gun-727-will-ferrell-and-val-kilmer/4289209639

i’m off to switzerland for the week. talk to you soon.

this priest has said that catholics who voted for obama should not receive communion.
he’s rather see the nation completely disappear in financial ruin.
idiot. this guy would have swung the hammer two thousand years ago nailing a hippie liberal into a tree on calvary.
God bless North Carolina

Tivo announced today that you can now order a pizza with from your television.
This is for people who are too lazy to pick up a phone (or who have fingers which are too fat to dial a phone) or for those who can’t work the Intertubes.
what the f? can we get any fatter / [...]

walking through a shopping plaza parking lot last night, i saw something i’d forgotten about:
cigarette piles
you know these things: dense concentrations of (usually) a specific brand of cigarette butts in a parking lot. they’re left when some idiot dumps out his/her ashtray as they’re getting in/out of the car.
is it so hard to dump [...]

so, i’ve loved my HP 8710w mobile workstation (a boring name for a notebook computer). i’ve had it since the beginning of the year, and it chugs along very well. it’s heavy, but powerful (just like me). photoshop, premier, video playback, visual studio, vmware, they all chug along nicely. it’s a good laptop, and i [...]

Nearly completely randomly, I’m a finalist in a content being held by Plantronics to redefine “teleworkers” (or someone who routinely works outside the office).
My suggestion, technomad, is one of ten finalists.
Can you please vote for technomad at:
www.plantronics.com/telewho
You can vote once per day (per browser), and I’d be eternally grateful if you helped me win.
Thanks!

i loved the old show. hasselhoff was such a giant puff, but the show was cool in a CHiPs-cool kinda way.
this new thing is a piece of crap. writing is terrible. acting is worse. the premise still rocks, but it isn’t even like they’ve introduced cool technology or any cool twists
even [...]

the conman maintains that this happened at brunswick, and there’s a chance that’s true, though i’m pretty sure this event happened at roller kingdom.
regardless, i have a new toy. it’s a full size arcade cabinet running MAME, the arcade simulator. that means that just about every arcade game we played as kids can be [...]

with all the flying i’ve been doing lately, this is actually something i think about.

i will congratulate him on his role in Top Gun.
i like finding actors before they were successful and congratulating them on very minor roles.
like kevin connely in Rocky V
got any good ones?

http://www.thesuperficial.com/

it will be beacuse of joe biden’s unnatural hair

Knight Rider, a shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist. Michael Knight, a young loner on a crusade to champion the cause of the innocent, the helpless, the powerless in a world of criminals who operate above the law.

The L and I have just completed a long weekend near Gatlinburg, Tennessee. The rest was well needed, and the time away from work while exploring a new place was worth every penny.
For those of you unfamiliar with Gatlinburg, it’s a sortof redneck Vegas without the strippers, gambling and opulent hotels. So, it’s [...]

for jerome, because he loves this shit
In honor of Disneyland’s 50th anniversary, we present 50 cool, obscure and simply odd things you probably didn’t know about the self-proclaimed Happiest Place on Earth. Many were culled from Mouse Tales by David Koenig (Bonaventure, $19.95). Some were provided by Disney archivist Dave Smith, and others came from [...]

Nutpharm has mentioned the mystery auctions on ebay in the past. in these auctions, you bid on something unknown. it might be a ferrari. it might be a rock in a box with a label that says ’suck this.’ you never know. but the seller certainly does better than the [...]

last month we had a very large tree come down in a windstorm. i knew it would eventually come down, and there was a real risk that it would hit the house. it missed the door to the dog room by about three feet. it’s amazing that it didn’t take out the [...]